disease (noun):

1. A pathological condition of a part, organ, or system of an organism resulting from various causes, such as infection, genetic defect, or environmental stress, and characterized by an identifiable group of signs or symptoms.
2. A condition or tendency, as of society, regarded as abnormal and harmful.

Doesn’t that sound like Political Correctness to you? Doesn’t it perfectly describe this absurd tendency by a small group of society’s vigilantes to wreak havoc and pain on us normal people? And just ponder for a moment on the possibilities. If we can get Political Correctness – OK I give in; if we can get PC classified as a disease, then we just might be able to start hunting for a cure. And let’s face it – we desperately need one.

The good news is that it isn’t infectious. In fact, I have a suspicion that to contract PC, one already has to be suffering from megalomania – which is also not infectious. I base this theory on the simple fact that I have never encountered anyone with PC who is not driven by ambition for power and control. Plus, if it was infectious, we would all be suffering from it and I think we can all agree that it is actually a very small number of people who are at risk.

I think this needs some close study. There is no doubt that this disease first came to light in the USA of the early 1980’s and has been slowly spreading around the world ever since. Europe, in particular, has a worryingly high incidence of sufferers but then, Europe has always had a high incidence of megalomaniacs as well. I call on drug companies around the world to put your best scientists on the task of finding a cure for these sadly deceived people, quickly, before we all slip into the abyss of their warped thinking.

And I call on the World Health Organisation to champion the cause and to appoint a team to research the issue with a strong leader to battle these forces of darkness. And let’s make it someone with clout, someone with vision, someone with authority to lead, not suffering from the very tendencies we need to stamp out. Which means it doesn’t automatically have to be a black, one-legged, single-mother, lesbian who was once convicted of welfare fraud. Just someone normal.